For the couple of holiday seasons immediately following my separation and divorce, seeing the boys was not a problem. In fact, we pretty much carried on as we had done before.  Visitation was not an issue, because, as long as it was just me, my presence with my ex and her family was tolerated.  As you might imagine, that all changed when my wife entered the picture.  All of the sudden, the details of the final divorce decree meant something, at least as far as who got what for holiday visitation.

We went strictly by the book for the first couple of seasons.  The schedule did not work for us.  Not just us, my ex had problems with it as well.  The schedule, as ordered, was disruptive and did not allow for the boys to really enjoy the holidays with anyone, her or me.

For once, this was an issue upon which we could agree.  Certain holidays are more important to her, others to me.  We worked it out.  Holiday stress became much more manageable and the boys don’t have to endure an awkward, disruptive exchange during a time in which they would otherwise be enjoying the fun of whatever holiday is at hand.

Here’s a good article on tips for working it out from my friends @ourfamilywizard:
http://ourfamilywizard.com/ofw/index.cfm/blog/tips-for-working-out-your-holiday-visitation-schedules/

YOU CAN AGREE with your ex for the benefit of your children.  There’s no reason your ego should suffer in the process.  Communicate with your ex.  Compromise, even if you didn’t during the divorce.  Your children will not be children for long.  Don’t be the one who taints their childhood holiday memories with the stress of mom’s and dad’s disagreement.  It’s about them, not you.

The post Child Custody and Visitation During the Holidays-It’s About Them appeared first on The Law Offices of Teague and McBay.